Tips for dating after divorce

4 July 2013

If you’ve been married then you’ll have been out of the dating game for longer than you care to remember, making dating enemy number 1.

Relationships on Female First

Dating doesn’t have to fill you with dread and fear, and getting back out there will definitely give your confidence a much needed boost!

Dating agency Bowes-Lyon Partnership have given us some tips on how to master dating after divorce.

Get to Know Yourself

After a painful divorce, many people lose sight of who they really are. Some have spent upwards of twenty years in marriages, and have changed as individuals in this time; some have even forgotten how to define themselves outside of a relationship.

Post-dating divorce is not simply about rushing back into the dating scene as soon as an ex, or trying to force yourself to forget how you feel about the break-up. Take the time to get to know yourself as a person and you will become truly relationship ready.

The Kids Are Alright

Often in divorce, there are children to consider. Whether they are young children or slightly older teens can have a big impact on how the situation is handled; either way, it is important to remember that they deserve integrity from all angles.

They might not be comfortable with their parents dating so soon, or they might wish that their parents didn’t seem so unhappy, and encourage them to start dating again. Every child is different, and it is always worth being honest and open with them about such topics.

Put it in the Past

Dating can be tricky enough without having to sit through constant, long-winded tales about someone’s most recent ex.

This is one of the cardinal dating sins, and although it can be tempting to constantly compare a new love interest to a long-term partner, accept that they are now in the past and try to forget about them.

Therapy sessions can often help those who are struggling to come to terms with a painful divorce; don’t use dates as substitutes for therapy.

Keep an Open Mind

It can be difficult, for those who have just come out of a relationship, for them to picture themselves with anyone but their recent ex. Don’t narrow your search so far that you end up searching for a carbon copy of your ex-wife or husband; open your mind and broaden your horizons.

Those who take this dating tip to heart often find that they discover someone different, who can make them happy in ways very different to the person in their previous relationship.