There are some things you are entitled to keep to yourself, even if you are with someone romantically. However if you are going to have a successful relationship- there are others things you should definitely share with your lover.
Your touch- You allow your partner to touch you in ways no-one else can and vice versa- so take advantage of that available intimacy. It doesn’t have to be about sex, but holding hands when you’re out and about, cuddling each other in bed, kissing before and after work and snuggling up on the couch. The power of touch is very strong in communicating your love for each other without a single word.
Your heart- If you don’t open up your heart to your significant other, you will never be able to experience the true extent of loving someone and have them love you back. You have to trust the person you are with, your relationship and also yourself to be able to do this.
Your feelings- If you can’t share your innermost feelings with your partner who can you share them with? You don’t have to tell them every little feeling you experience, however if it’s fitting for your relationship then it might be wise to share so you both know where each other is at.
Your time- Partners do need alone time- however you need to strike a balance between ‘me time’ and ‘couple time’. If your alone time is encroaching on the time you share with your partner you could find yourself in trouble.
Your dreams- If you dream of having children, travelling to somewhere specific, aspire to reach a certain level at your job, write a novel- whatever it is- tell your lover. They need to know which direction you are heading in and most importantly, so they can help you in any way to achieve your goals.
Your non-negotiables- Mortgage, marriage, kids, religion, beliefs, morals- all the important deal breaker kind of stuff. You need to be on the same lines for all the big decisions or at least be willing to compromise on a few. If not, you are setting yourself up for arguments, hurt and the possible demise of your relationship.
Your mood- Don’t leave it up to your partner to guess what mood you are in. If you are feeling sad/angry/frustrated because of something specific or nothing in particular- let them know. There is nothing more frustrating than trying to fathom what mood someone is in and how best to approach them when you might be barking up the wrong tree altogether.
Your limitations- There are certain things you will only take so much of but once you’ve reached that threshold- your partner needs to know not to push you any further. So tell them where you draw the line. A few examples of this could be- how much you are willing to spend on something or how much time you want to invest in a project.
Your likes and dislikes- From something as simple as making a cup of tea to booking a holiday- your lover needs to know what you appreciate but on the other end of the scale- the things you really don’t want or would rather do without.
A hobby- You should have at last one activity you love doing together. It could be watching TV shows, going to the cinema, eating out, bowling, the theatre, exercising or shopping. Whatever it is- make sure you have just one thing you know you will always enjoy doing as a pair. Then you can rest assured that you will always have something to share even when you are old and grey.
tagged in Partner