On dating sites you only have a few moments to impress, with a staggering 48% who know if they are interested in you within 25 seconds of viewing your profile, so time is of the essence when it comes to standing out from the crowd of online faces.
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Your photo has to be well selected, that goes without saying- a photo of you in a darkened night club, a blurry pic or one of you amongst a sea of other women is misleading and not casting you in the best light. Granted this is important, as men take three times longer looking at profile pictures than women. So pluck those eyebrows, wax those moustaches and brush that hair so you are made up to look your best!
For women however, 45 more seconds are spent on the bumph that goes with the pic- that said- make sure yours is still intriguing and unique. Once the guy has finished with your profile pic- you want to keep him engaged. After all, 27 per cent of singles will take a second look if the written profiles impressed them, even if the photos didn't!
There is careful balance at play here for both men and women- a fine line between being braggy and being confident. No-one likes a bragger (48%, in fact); it says that they are only interested in telling you their story rather than taking the time out to hear yours. The same goes for you- don’t be too gushy about your achievements and experiences- keep the feminine mystique alive!
Taking anything to the extreme can be a turn off (24%) - it gives the impression that if you’re not into it too then they won’t be interested in meeting you. There is also the fear that it is possibly all you will talk about on your date. It’s great to have a passion in life, but not one that you push onto other people or that takes up your entire conversation.
Clichés are also a pitfall that few tolerate in an online profile, sayings such as: zest for life, love life, great sense of humour are all overdone. They might say that you have not taken the time out to think about your profile properly and have resorted to the golden oldies.
This goes hand in hand with bad grammar, 24%. If you have not even proof read your profile are you that bothered about looking for someone really? Think about it!
Try not to tell porkies either! Men lie about their age, height and salary as opposed to women who lie about their figures. When they meet you they will know that you were careful with the truth and this does not bode well for the future. Beginning on a lie can make your date doubt your honesty in other areas too.
It seems, however, that the over 35s are less likely to lie- perhaps at this age, people are more comfortable in their own skin and themselves and don’t feel the need to bend the truth anymore. Take a leaf from their book!
So with Valentine's day looming, dating sites are awash with people looking to impress-so what can you say to make yourself ‘pop’ from the page? "Choice words" says dating expert Hayley Quinn. It can up your chances of date success considerably.
Here are Hayley’s exclusive profile greats, and some 'first message' opening liners to keep those eager men wanting more!
Do say: "I love hiking on a Saturday, so I'm allergic to nightclubs on a Friday night."
Because If you're too middle of the road your profile won't speak to anyone. Make sure you specify and allow the people who you're supposed to connect with find you.
Do say: "I'm not too shy to say I'm pretty awesome at... "
Because: Self esteem is sexy, don't fall into the trap of putting yourself down. Modesty is often the most sincere form of deceit, and you're not fooling anyone…
Do say: "If you love fearing for your life I'd recommend the Angel's Landing hike in Zion. Utah is a strange state but I love epic landscapes and holidays where your hands get muddy."
Because: EVERYONE likes travelling; build intrigue with the other person by offering a recommendation of your favourite spot in photographic detail.
Messaging:
Do: 'Were you really telling the truth when you said…'
Because: Forget boring questions; use statements that tweak curiosity and make them want to open up the message
Do: 'Shall we meet at midnight then hop on a plane? Actually, that's only four minutes away but write me quickly anyway...'
Because: Be original, fun and specific. Popular singles may have 3 'ask outs' a day so you need your message to stand out.
www.hayleyquinn.com
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