Model Sam Taylor enjoys open relationships just like Joy on BBC1’s hit drama Wanderlust and says: “Life’s too short to stick with just one person.”
Sam Taylor thinks monogamy is "boring"
The 44-year-old dates up to three men at the same time because she finds monogamy ‘boring.’
Sam said: “It seems crazy that society dictates that we should find a life partner in our 20s or 30s and only have sex with them for the rest of our lives - more than 50 years in most people’s cases. Whoever thought that was a good idea?
“Sex is like food - no matter how good it is, it gets very boring if you eat the same meal every night. Why not spice things up and try different things? That way, life is a lot more interesting.”
Sam is a real life example of Australian actress Toni Collette’s therapist character Joy in Wanderlust.
In the drama, Joy suggests to her husband Alan, played by Steven Mackintosh, that they have an open relationship after they both have flings when she realises she is bored having sex with him. She has sex with a man she meets at her swimming class while he cheats with a teacher at his school.
The drama has caused controversy - being branded ‘the most X-rated drama ever’ - for graphic sex scenes including the first female orgasm shown on BBC.
But for Sam it reflects her daily life as she juggles three relationships with wealthy married men.
Sam said: “I tried monogamy and I have had long and happy relationships where we have both remained faithful.
“But in the end it always ended in disappointment because sex with the same person becomes boring over time.
“At the end of my last relationship, I suggested to my partner that we were both honest with each other and saw other people discreetly when we wanted some fun.
“So we embarked on an open relationship just like Joy and Alan on Wanderlust. Soon we were meeting so many new people, we decided to go our separate ways because it was more exciting dating casually without the drudgery of a regular relationship.”
Sam had her first ‘affair’ with a 43-year-old banker she met on IllicitEncounters.com, Britain’s leading dating website for married people.
The site was recommended to her by a friend because it has lots of rich male members who are looking for open relationships - often with the knowledge of their wives.
Sam, from Brentwood, Essex, said: “I wasn’t looking for another serious, monogamous relationship - I just wanted a bit of excitement and to meet a regular buddy who wanted sex and fun without the hassle of becoming boyfriend and girlfriend.
“IllicitEncounters.com is perfect for that because men on the site fully embrace the idea of open relationships. They are doing it with the permission of their wives or their wives are at it themselves like Joy in the TV show because they are bored of having sex with their husbands.
“I could really relate to her character in the show - we are the same age and all the awkwardness she showed when she was having sex with her husband was like my long-term relationships.”
Soon after seeing the banker, Sam met another lover - and juggled both at the same time.
She said: “I was having a great time with the banker who is a multi-millionaire and used to fly me all over Europe for mini-breaks which he disguised as business trips.
“He already had two other women on the go, a secretary and a personal trainer he had also met on IllicitEncounters, and he suggested I do the same.
“I met a 39-year-old insurance executive a few weeks later who was stuck in a sexless marriage and was looking for a bit of excitement. He and his wife had three teenage children and she was completely preoccupied with bringing up the kids and had little time for him. They had married young and she was his first serious girlfriend. He was keen to see what it was like to have sex with someone else and wanted to meet a woman who would not upset things at home.
“I began seeing him at the same time as the banker and things spiralled from there.
“Soon I was getting other requests for dates and I met an IT manager who worked in London - hundreds of miles from his wife and family in Yorkshire. He had an arrangement with his wife that he could see other people while he was in London just as long as nothing happened when he was back at home in Yorkshire. He was looking for a bit of release while he was living on his own and I fitted the bill perfectly.”
Sam insists that she is not a ‘marriage wrecker’ and that she only dates men who either have the permission of their wives or have no intention of ever leaving their wives.
She said: “I am not looking for a husband - I just want a bit of fun with a like-minded person. I use IllicitEncounters because its clients are wealthy and are on the same page as me when it comes to commitment. I’m told old for sites like Tinder and I like to date men who have a bit of cash. My idea of a good night is not a fumble in the cinema followed by chicken and chips at Nando’s. I want to see the world with exciting, sophisticated men.
"We travel together to some of the best hotels in the world and I get spoilt rotten - we eat in the finest restaurants and shop in the most exclusive boutiques. I end up having the time of my life and get a few new pieces for my wardrobe or a wonderful new item of jewellery.
"I am just glad that Wanderlust is reflecting what is really happening in lots of people’s relationships. An affair can be good for a marriage and give unhappy spouses the release they are looking for. Open relationships work very successfully for lots of couples.”
IllicitEncounters.com spokesman Christina Grant said: “Sam is typical of lots of the men and women enjoying affairs on our site.
“A lot of our members are in open relationships and see several people at the same time with their full knowledge and consent.
“A typical member has been married for five years or more and decides to branch out and seek fresh excitement when marital sex becomes boring and routine.
“We have been getting record numbers of new registrations since Wanderlust started on BBC1. Lots of people are enjoying the show and realising they can enjoy the same lifestyle by signing up.”
Every week, around 20,000 people in the UK are having affairs on IllicitEncounters.com.
More than one million people have registered with the site since it started in 2003 and the highest proportion of members are wealthy people in London and the Home Counties.