Anonymous asks:

My partner is struggling with a sporting injury, it causes him massive amounts of pain and he has recently gone onto anti-depressants because it's getting him down so much. I don't know what more I can do to help him get out of his terribly low mood. Any ideas? I feel like the more I help him to do things around the house, the angrier he gets. 

Relationship expert Jessica Leoni says: “I really feel for you and it sounds like your partner has gone into a real slump because of this injury. It does worry me that the injury is still causing him ‘massive amounts of pain’. That really does sound rather alarming and there is surely more his doctor can do to alleviate his suffering. Eliminating or at least lessening that pain is going to be a crucial step on his road to recovery.

Image courtesy of Unsplash

Image courtesy of Unsplash

“Given how alarming his immediate situation is, I can totally understand why your partner needs anti-depressants to control his moods. Hopefully these will be a temporary measure while he recovers from the injury and his pain subsides.

“I think one of the big factors in his depression is the fact that he has stopped playing sports due to his injury. You see this a lot with sports enthusiasts. Their bodies find it difficult to cope when they suddenly stop exercising regularly and they lose the natural highs they got previously from the endorphins (natural mood enhancers) which flood through your body when you do sport.

“In terms of improving his moods, is there some gentle exercise he could resume while recovers from this injury? Maybe he will be well enough to lift some weights at the gym. Perhaps walking is an option - and you could do this together and build this up until he was ready to do more strenuous exercise such as jogging.

“Try to maintain your intimate life. Intimacy is often the first thing that goes when one half of a couple feels depressed, but it is the glue that keeps all relationships together and it is a crucial mood enhancer. Sometimes it is good to be intimate even when you or your partner doesn’t feel like it just to maintain the habit and the healthy routine. If you have got out of the habit of having sex, why not arrange a date night? Buy some champagne or prosecco and treat yourself to some new lingerie and restore the intimacy in your relationship.

“Good luck - you sound like a lovely, caring partner and I am sure that this is a temporary setback. I am hopeful that your partner will recover from his injury and be back to his bubbly old, exercise-mad self in no time. And when he does he will feel even closer to you because of all the support you have given him during this short lull.” 

Jessica is a relationship expert for the dating site IllicitEncounters.com 


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