Julie asks :
Hi Lucy,
My boyfriend text me to say, he might have had a rash after we were together. When I challenged him about it, he didn’t get checked, or tell me the result, he wouldn't respond, apart from, that he did have one. He was even planning to come and see me a couple of days later, but I can't understand why, if he thought I had given him this so called rash. Why would he put himself at risk again knowing I hadn't had time for a check-up? I am going to do one for my own peace of mind. He can be quite jealous, do you think he could be lying, why wouldn't he tell me more about this when I asked him several times?
Our Reply
Hi Julie,
Firstly, you are right to get checked out. I am presuming that this is a sexually transmitted rash? If so, then you need to visit your doctor to get it checked out. They will likely need to do a blood test or urine test on you to find out whether you have any STIs which often can easily be treated with antibiotics.
Syphilis, for example, can have a secondary symptom of a rash, which is a bacterial infection. The rash is highly infectious and is generally quite sore. It can last up to six weeks before disappearing, so certainly worth going to the doctor to seek treatment for.
He may be embarrassed which is why he hasn’t given you the full story. Even if he has the rash, if he loves you then something like this he may not want to get in the way of seeing you, but he still might find it hard to talk about.
That said, unless you both go to see about getting treatment, chances are you will keep repeatedly infecting one another and the problem will persist.
Maybe try to work on the physical symptoms first to put your minds at ease and fix what started this in the first place. Then perhaps move onto talking about why he felt he couldn’t talk to you about it.
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