Jasmine asks :

Hi Lucy,

Is it ok to be grieving after a pet? I loved my pet cat Pip. He was my best friend and I loved him so much. It has been 6 months since he passed away. I was so sad and quite soon after we bought two kittens. I love them but I don't have a special connection with them and every night I'm crying for Pip. I want to stop this and be happy but I don't know how.

Hi Jasmine,

 I loved my cat Pip

I loved my cat Pip

It's completely normal to grieve over a pet that has passed away. Pets are one of the family and love you without judgement, so sometimes they can be easier to connect with than friends, partners or family because their love is unconditional.

People can take much longer to accept and move on from a death in the family and 6 months is not that long of a time, so your emotions still may be quite raw.

Perhaps getting new kittens has emphasized just how much you do miss your pet because they are still adjusting to their environment whereas Pip was settled and knew the routine.

Think back to when you first got Pip, there was likely a few weeks where you were establishing a bond with him. That is all that is happening again and in time you should feel more of a connection with your new cats. Maybe spend a bit more time with them and get to know their personalities. You won't forget Pip but their presence and love might go some way to helping you move on.

No two cats are ever going to be the same- so try not to compare them like for like. Your new pets will have their own personalities- so try to embrace their differences rather than regretting that they are unlike Pip. If you show them affection then they are bound to show you it back.

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