Jay asks :

Dear Lucy,


I hope you are doing good. I am 25 years old and I have been in a committed relationship for 7 years. There is no problem between us as such, but I have a very peculiar problem. I am very fond of my girlfriend. She is really very pretty and sweet. But I always have this feeling of babying her which is good but not all the time. When she wants to get physical then also I have this strange feeling. We rarely get intimate. Please will you give me advice?

Hi Jay,

 What can I do?

What can I do?

It is good that you are still attracted to how pretty and sweet your girlfriend is after being together so long, but it sounds like this is getting in the way of your sex life.

These are admirable qualities in a person, so it is likely that you don't what them to go away, but there are certain times in a relationship where being sexy is just as desirable.

Have you talked to her about ways in which you can spice things up in the bedroom? Perhaps discuss things like role play or ask her if she would like to wear some sexy lingerie. This may help to take her out of her normal routine and encourage her to adopt her sexier side. Many women report how sexy and assertive dressing up can make them feel before getting intimate with their partner.

Perhaps you could try introducing some sex toys into the bedroom, she might be a little shy at first, but again this might help to give her more confidence in experimenting with new things.

It could be that she already knows her behaviours are consistent both in and outside of the bedroom and needs a little confidence boost from you. Why not tell her how sexy she is more- the more you say it- the more she may believe it and come out of her shell a bit more when the lights go down.

by for relationships.femalefirst.co.uk
find me on and follow me on

Need Help?

If you need help or advice, you can ask Yin & Yang. It's quick, easy, free and you don't have to leave your real name.