Anonymous asks :
Hi Lucy,
I've been feeling really low for a while now and don't enjoy my life as much as I used to, I hardly go out or even have the willingness to do anything, my relationship has started to suffer as I am more distant from my boyfriend than I was and always worry what he is thinking and if he's happy etc. Years ago I had a similar experience twice whilst on "the pill" and came off them to try and balance myself again which worked a treat. However for years now I have been under unfair pressure at work and have had jobs piled on me and unrealistic tasks set upon me and stress became a normal feeling. I also get a lot of anxiety as well as feeling low; I'm not sure whether it’s the pill again that's caused it or the pressure at work I’ve been under for so long. I’m not sure how to make myself feel better and was looking for some advice, mainly to help save my relationship and myself, my boyfriend is really understanding and I love him more than anything and I hate seeing us suffer because of my constant bubble I feel I'm in. Any advice would be a big help, thanks for your time.
Hi Anonymous,
Agony Aunts on Female First
It sounds like there are a lot of things that could making you feel this way. It could be something isolated, or it could be a combination of factors and you may need to tackle each one in turn.
The first thing I would suggest is perhaps coming off your pill. If it worked for you last time, then it might again. You could give yourself a little break and see how you get on. If you feel much better then it could be just that you need to look for an alternative form of birth control that has no bearing on your hormones, such as condoms.
If it's not, then it might be a case of looking for another job that is better suited to you. Could you look for alternative employment? Or could you talk to your superior about getting some assistance in your current role?
Perhaps some extra support from a counsellor might also help to explore your feelings of anxiety as well as talk about work, your relationship and your low moods.
In terms of your relationship, you might need to talk through with your partner what you feel is the next best form of contraception for you both to try. If you went through this before while you were with him, then he should be well rehearsed in how to support you during the transition between your current and next choice of birth control.
If you went through a low point when you were on your last pill, then he has had past experience of you during your highs and your lows and he's still with you. Chances are he wants to see you as happy and you crave to be, so by both having the same goal; he may well want to support you though this process.
If you do decide to see a professional to talk about your feelings then this might also filter down to your relationship too. You may find it easier to talk to him about things rather than just thinking them and be better prepared to work through them if you have the correct tools in place.
tagged in Relationship boyfriend
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