Anonymous asks:

Hi! 

So, the problem that I'm struggling with right now is that I have been suffering from emotional issues from the past few years. 

I went to a doctor and the doctor prescribed medicines. 

I used to take those medicines but now the doctor suggested that I stop taking the medicine so I did! 

However, after stopping the medication, I'm suffering from headaches and feeling nauseous. 

Can you please give me some advice on how to improve mental health? 

Besides this, my other problem is that my maternal relatives have said many things to me which have emotionally hurt me but despite knowing all the truth, my father, my mother and sister still stay in touch with them. 

It just feels like they are biased and they have not emotionally or financially supported me during my harsh years! 

I just find it so difficult to live with them! Can you please give me some advice on how to get rid of those self-centered and bitter people? 

Thanks a lot for your help.

 

Richard Reid, Psychologist, Author and Founder of Pinnacle Therapy - www.pinnacletherapy.co.uk said;  

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

"There’s a couple of things going on here and I think the first one is around medication. The person describes headaches and nausea, this is often the case when people are coming off medication and I’d be interested to know to what extent they’re following guidance in withdrawing from medication. Normally, when people come off their medication it will be done in a staged process, so it will happen slowly over a period of time gauging how they react to the medication and adapting accordingly. From this message it’s not entirely clear and it may well be that the person has just stopped and if that’s the case it’s not surprising that they’re having headaches and nausea. If thatis the case or even if they’re getting this in reaction to a staggered withdrawal from medication, it’s definitely worth speaking to their GP just to get their input. Sometimes headaches and nausea can also be caused by anxiety, people sometimes have anxiety when they come off their medication either because there are underlying symptoms that were being masked by the medication or it’s just purely anxiety around what it will mean and what the possibilities are now that they are coming off medication and if that’s the case I think it’s definitely worth speaking to a therapist to get some ideas on how to manage that anxiety. Personally, I think that when people are on medication it’s often useful to have some type of talking therapy alongside that to help them manage symptoms but also to prepare them with some skills that they can use for the time when they start to come off medication. For the most part, medication’s only intended to be a short to medium term measure to help people regroup before they start to address what might be going on underneath but unfortunately in many cases, medication is used as a pure alternative to talking therapy. 

In terms of the other issues around maternal relatives, this is a tricky one and very much depends how tied in this person is with those people. If they’re living with them it obviously becomes extremely difficult, but, I think part of this is about starting to express more about what they need, how it is they need to be spoken to, what their boundaries are, and in many cases we might tell people that we’re not happy with their behaviour but we don’t necessarily tell them what it is we need as an alternative to that. It could be simply about giving them more guidance in terms of what is needed, however, that clearly always doesn’t do the trick. People aren’t respectful of our needs or even then, they’re incapable of delivering on those. If that’s the case then I think it may be about starting to put some distance between themselves and those relatives and it might be even communicating why it is that they’re doing that in the hope that it will be a wake up call to those people. But certainly, it’s like the old adage said; 'we can’t choose our relatives' and so if you’ve been trying for a number of years and you really feel that you’ve done everything that you can do, then I think it’s about protecting yourself, because, if we’re around people that are difficult, it wears away at our resilience and our happiness and our sense of self. So, as much as possible try to move away from those people if it’s not possible to influence them. I think as a counter balance to that, also starting to seek out more of the types of relationships that are nourishing and this is important at any time but particularly if it is the case that you’re in some way tied to these people it’s really useful to have some form of counter balance. So you might want to think about, are there people already in your life who are a positive influence that you could spend more time with? Or, failing that, are there particular types of activities or groups which are likely to involve the kind of people that are going to be like-minded and if there are, maybe you could start to experiment with that and start to meet people."


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