tamela asks :

Hi Lucy,

I need some help talking dirty talk to my boyfriend

Hi Tamela, thanks for getting in touch.

 What can I do?

What can I do?

If you haven’t done this at all already then don’t go all in with a barrage of dirty talk, I would suggest doing it subtly. People often think that dirty talk needs to be scripted and lengthy, but you are not reciting a monologue you are simply offering a few indicators to get each other more aroused.

The most effective ways are when you are out and about with your man, you are almost ready to leave and you whisper in his ear what you would like to do to him when you get home. When you are in a crowded place there is nothing sexier than your partner giving you something to look forward to for when you are back in the bedroom. It doesn’t have to be overly inventive, just what you would normally do together, but it will catch him off guard and get him excited!

Dirty talk during sex is always effective as it reassures him that he is doing exactly what you want and if he’s not it’s the perfect opportunity to get him to by directing him with your voice. If you are loud in bed then your man will be able to hear your build up to orgasm and know when he is close to making you climax. A well placed ‘right there’, ‘that feel’s so good’ or ‘harder’ can have very positive effects during sex.

Another way to talk dirty is to tell him about a dirty dream you’ve had or what you imagine when you are masturbating- this will get him hot under the collar especially if your fantasy was about another woman. Men are inquisitive creatures and will often ask more questions to keep the saucy interaction going!

Try not to overthink it, or plan it into your sexual play as this is when it sounds like something from a porn film. If you are quiet when you reach orgasm- try moaning and groaning a bit more- it works as a release for you but gives him the reassurance that he needs to let him know he is rocking your world! This might then naturally lead onto using a few choice words of phrases once you feel comfortable being more vocal! 

Good luck,

Lucy x 


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