Anonymous asks:

A married friend is in love with me. 

We’ve been deeply in love with each other for almost four years now. 

I shifted my country for studies. He was trying to apply alongside me for jobs. But couldn’t get through. 

Now he’s staying back with her and their kid. But he keeps calling to check on me, is he pretending? Or wanting to keep me away? 

I’ve been severely depressed about the whole situation since he’s promised to apply for separation and convinced my mom somehow that he’ll marry me. 

I can’t seem to go ahead and date guys or get married. It’s horrible for me now that I’ve even reached a certain age..

 

Sex and relationship expert Jessica Leoni said: “Sorry but this man sounds like a total waste of space and I think you would be better off not contacting him and moving on with your life.

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

“It is obvious that you are madly in love with him and you will probably ignore this advice but I see no happy ending to this story. He has had ample opportunity to leave his wife in the last four years and has chosen not to do so. Why is that so? I suspect that he likes the idea of being in love with you more than the reality. Also he has important responsibilities at home. The most important person to consider in this whole scenario is the child he has just had with his wife. That child will benefit most from being brought up by a mum and dad in a loving environment. Your partner selfishly cannot see this and is spinning you along while staying with his wife. I suspect he is never going to leave her and that is probably for the best.

“I know the thought of living your life without him leaves you feeling ‘severely depressed’ but I don’t see how you two are ever going to get it together. Let’s say he does leave his wife. If he really wanted to marry you and settle down, as he has told your mother, why has he not done this in the last four years? Seeing as she is so well versed on the situation, I would be interested to know what your mum thinks of the situation. I suspect she will tell you to move on, too. She will know that hurt he will cause both to his wife and his child by pursuing you further.

“You have contemplated moving on and thought about dating other guys but cannot bring yourself to embark on another relationship. You should. It will be tough at first but it is the only way you will find lasting happiness. Wash this guy out of your hair and meet someone new who is worthy of your love. Leave him, his wife and their child to their own devices. Hopefully he will wake up and realise what a selfish s*** he has been. Somehow I doubt it.”

Jessica is a sex and relationship expert for the dating site, IllicitEncounters.com 


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