Jenniiii asks :
Iv been with my guy for just over 16 months and things have started to get a bit slow in the bedroom - in the start we were all over each other and he constantly made me feel sexy - i know as the relationship grows people feel more comfortable and these things will slow down but now i have looked at it closely iv noticed i cant remember the last time he seemed to be truly attracted to me. i know he loves me dearly and he says that he is attracted to me completely but its starting to knock the confidence i had over my self appeal..... how can i try and change this? :(
Hi Jenni, thanks for writing in.
What can I do?
This is completely normal to feel this way, it is probably less about his attraction to you and more about just being comfortable in the relationship. Couples feel they can try less, the longer they are together, however this should not be the case. Sex and relationships need constant nurturing to keep them alive. He is still attracted to you and loves you, but nothing is new anymore, the appeal has worn off because he knows what to expect from your love life and so do you.
This is the point where you need to mix it up and introduce new things in the bedroom.
You could try dressing up for him in themed costumes or some new sexy lingerie, using sex toys, erotic literature, watching porn together, try new sexual positions or sex games.
There are lots of things you can do to add some spice back into your sex.
If you have not experimented a lot before, then introduce these things slowly, so they don’t wear thin quickly, but also you don’t overwhelm him.
www.lovehoney.co.uk, has come great ideas for this, have a browse through the site and see if anything could work for you. They offer a lot of beginner’s products to ease you in to each new experience.
Female First have a lovehoney.co.uk deal of the day each day in the sex section, to save you some money on a range of items to make your sex life more satisfying.
We also have regular interviews and tips to make it better, so keep checking the love and sex section for inspiration!
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