The Little Book of Kink is the perfect book for singles and couples who want to spice up their sex lives. From the fundamental rules and newbie guidelines to kinky positions and role-play scenarios, we've got you covered.
What is kink?
Kink obviously means different things to different people. It may involve blindfolding your lover with a silk scarf or attending a dungeon party with your submissive partner on a leash. For the purposes of this book, I use the term kink to refer to any activities or behaviours that challenge you to push your limits. It may include dominance, submission, bondage, discipline, pain, sensation play, dirty talk, role play, or rough sex, but this list is by no means exhaustive. You can define kinky sex any way you want and feel confident that your desires, fantasies, and needs are perfectly natural. Sex researchers Alfred Kinsey and Wardell Pomeroy summed it up perfectly in their assertion that the only unnatural sex acts are those which you are unable to perform.
Why do couples want kinkier sex?
Why not? The appeal of kink is complex: it can be novel, exciting, unpredictable and taboo making kink an attractive antidote to monotony in the bedroom.
You offer some alternatives to the classics such as More Than Missionary, Kinky dog and The Submissive Slide, please can you tell us a bit more about these?
Each of these positions allows you to take something familiar and kink it up with some dominant/submissive role play, naughty props and the thrill of the unknown.
The More Than Missionary position has it all! He can reach the greatest depths of penetration while soaking in a view of her body writhing with delight, all while maintaining total control. She benefits from the sensations of penetration, vulval rubbing, and sexual submission enhanced by her foetal position. While lying on her side, he slips in between her legs while on his knees and exerts power from above by pinning her wrists together.
The Submissive Slide is the perfect position for the woman-on-top in every sense! She gets a full view of her compliant partner, and he gets to lie back and enjoy being dominated in more ways than one. Riding atop her lover, she controls every sexual move, from the depth of penetration to the speed and angle of their bodies. Her power is further intensified by the fact that he lies at her feet, entrusting her with his entire body—including his most vulnerable and prized asset.
Doggie-style may be the oldest trick in the book, but you have never tried it like this! The Kinky Dog brings power play, bondage, and spanking into the mix, making it the ideal position for an evening (or morning) of intoxicating sex.
In this kinked up version of the traditional doggie-style, her wrists are bound together and attached to the headboard while one of her legs is forced upward to give him even more control over her helpless, but delighted, body.
Even if a couple thinks that their sex life is fine, why could they do with a little more kink in the bedroom?
I wouldn't prescribe "kink" or any other sexual activity to a couple, but if they're intrigued by sensory deprivation (e.g. blindfolds), rough play (e.g. spanking) and/or sensation play (e.g. feathers), they might want to dip their toes into the well of kinky sex to further explore these interests.
Why is it important to keep the vanilla positions alive with new twists?
Variety is the spice of life. When our minds and bodies learn to predict outcomes, we go into auto-pilot and lost the essential anticipatory element of sexual desire and arousal. Whether you change positions, speed, rhythm or outfits, small changes can produce significant results when it comes to sexual pleasure.
Please can you tell us a bit about your background
I'm a sexologist (PhD), international speaker and television personality based out of Toronto, Canada. I've worked with thousands of couples across the globe (from Paris to Argentina) and provide training in the field of sexual health to professionals (teachers, doctors, therapists) across Europe and North America.
You book has a sample contract, please can you tell us a bit about this.
The sample contract is intended to open the lines of communication with regard to desires, boundaries and concerns before readers engage in (kinky) sex. Some people negotiate boundaries verbally while others prefer to write down the terms of their agreement. The choice is yours.
What is next for you?
My biggest writing project to date, The New Sex Bible (Quiver Books) will be released in early 2014 and I anticipated filming another season of PlayboyTV's SWING in the New Year. I'll also continue my speaking tour from the Great White North to the sunny Caribbean Sea.