Written by Nichi Hodgson, Dating Consultant at www.theinnercircle.co
Nobody tells the truth about their relationship
We don’t mean other couples are deliberately out to deceive you but the fact is, couples relating stories about their relationships are either exaggerating for entertainment value or to point score over on another; downplaying the severity of their conflicts, or simply unaware of some fact that’s blindingly obvious to everyone else but to which they never allude. And never trust anyone that starts a sentence with, ‘We would never…’.
Your relationship has reason
For better or for worse, you were attracted to one another and your mighty fine quirks right back at the beginning for a reason and the reason is still there. Forget about everyone else’s cute qualities. Instead, reminisce about the beginning of days and feel the feelings come flooding back.
Science says no!
It’s a scientifically proven fact that comparing yourself to others lowers your own feelings of relationship satisfaction and sense of self-esteem. Why bother?
So what if their instagram is cuter than Olivia Palermo’s and Johannes Huebel’s? You’ve got just as many lovely memories - and they’re genuine, NOT curated.
Comparing yourselves turns friends into rivals
Do you really want to sit at a couples’ brunch seething with envy? Wouldn’t you rather be laughing into your avo on toast with your mates that happen to be a perfect compliment to the both of you? Think about it.
So what if they have a better flat or bigger joint income? How does greater material gain equate to whether they have a better LOVE?
The couple that hones perfect bodies together…
...also spends a lot of very regimented no alcohol, chocolate, cheese or pizza nights in. Is that really how you want to be frittering away precious date nights with your love?
They don’t share your pet names
Or that memory of that memorable hike in Mykonos. Or the knowledge of your first kiss and last cuddle. Those are to be cherished, not disregarded or diminished.
So what if they’re moved in/mortgaged/married?
All it means is that they’ve progressed further on the so-called ‘relationship escalator’ sooner, not that they love one another any more. You’ll get there in your own sweet time.
Fresh passion is already fading
New love is intoxicating to feel and envy-inducing to observe. But it’s mere infatuation and that infatuation will wear off in another few months. Then the real work - which you’re no doubt doing with your squeeze - truly begins.