Braun has recently found that 86% of Brits will tell their partner a white lie about a gift they’ve received from them. So, if you’re in any doubt about what your lover means when they comment on a dud Christmas present- here is a rough translation:
“It’s lovely”- It really means- it’s lovely – but not for me. Do you know me at all? Obviously not or you would have given this to your mum- or your sister or that lass you work with- anyone but me.
“This is really useful”- I will never use this and I will hide it in some drawer in the house in the hope you will forget you bought it for me. Then I will probably donate it to charity if you don’t ask about it. Or flog it on eBay.
“Thanks so much – I nearly bought this for myself”- I would never buy this for myself, you should know that this is so not me and if you don’t- what the hell does this mean for our relationship?! Woah- don’t pull at that thread!
“What a lovely surprise”- I’m not sure what to say- it is a surprise but not a GOOD one- could you seriously not have thought of a better surprise than this?
“You shouldn’t have”- No really, you shouldn’t have! You should have just given me the money to spend on what I actually want instead. You could have saved yourself the effort and just bought a card and put some money in it- job done- but instead- THIS!?
“This goes with everything”- It literally goes with nothing I own- do you not pay attention to anything I own/use/wear/do?!
“What an interesting gift”- This present is just batsh*t crazy- there are no other words for this. Were you high when you bought this? WTF?
“I love it – where did you get it”- Where did you get it, so I can return it? Please tell me you didn’t spend a lot on this piece of crap if I can’t take it back.
“It was so nice of you to think of me”- Next time- use a little more brain power thanks. You clearly wanted to be in and out of the shop as fast as possible.
“Wow – I can’t believe how well you know my taste”- You don’t know me at all- we should be ashamed to call ourselves a couple because friends wouldn’t get this SO wrong.
tagged in Christmas