Ah Christmas. If there's any time of year that can make the most content of singletons suffer from a case of the green eyed monster observing cosy couples basking in romantic glory, it's Christmas. Yes the lights still look pretty, Elf is still as nostalgic and the booze tastes just as good when you're single (actually, it probably tastes better!) but somehow, when you don't have someone to share all that with, it can turn the festive cheer a little sour.
The thing is, there's absolutely no point in being miserable at Christmas just because you don't have a boyfriend/girlfriend. Wallowing in your singledom is unattractive during the 51 other weeks of the year and Christmas is no different. Let's look at some instant pros; you're probably off work, you have an excuse to eat and drink as much as you like, the hangovers don't seem half as bad and the social scene is buzzing throughout December regardless of whether you're single or not.
Here are some ideas on how you can have a genuinely happy time being single this Christmas -:
It's not all about you
Christmas is a time for enjoying family and friends. Use the time you have to really make an effort to be around them and be fully present in their company. Whether it's going for walks, sales shopping, relaxing watching films or having a few drinks down the pub, reconnect with them and appreciate the quality time you spend with them.
Do something for charity
If you're feeling down about being uncoupled at Christmas why not use the opportunity to do something positive for someone else? It doesn't have to be anything too committal - helping out at a local charity for a few hours or volunteering at a shelter, maybe. You'll be amazed at what the feeling of actively doing something to help others does for you and will encourage you to acknowledge all the great things you have going on in your own life.
Socialise and have fun!
Believe it or not, you're not the only single person on the planet this Christmas! So get out there and mingle! December is the prime time to amp up the glam factor, get dressed up to your hearts content and when you're single, you can go exactly where you want and when. Rally up your friends and get some social events in the diary. Get online and arrange some festive dates. Pamper yourself, treat yourself to an amazing outfit for the season and do things for yourself that make you feel like the best version of you. Make the decision to do Christmas in style!
Set new goals
No, I'm not talking about resolutions that you'll never stick to! Use the time you have over Christmas constructively to really think about what you really want from the year ahead and what changes you might want to make. Why not think about what you can proactively do to start that business or what steps you need to take to plan that trip you've always wanted to go on? If you don't want to be single, what can you do to change that? Can you try online dating, re-write a more compelling online dating profile, go to singles events or plan to do things that will widen your social circle and your chances of meeting someone? Where would your ideal man/woman spend their free time? Plan to go to these places to find them! Try new things for yourself too. You're more likely to meet someone who is more aligned to what you want when you're doing things that make you happy - and not dwelling on being single!
Make new memories
If this is your first Christmas being single after a break-up, give yourself permission to be sad. That's ok and it's completely normal. Just don't spend the entire festive season wallowing and determined to have a bad time. It's not all or nothing; you can still feel that inevitable sadness but do positive things that will help to give you a boost and enjoy Christmas. Try and see it as a positive - as tough as it is, you can't change what happened. You can change your mindset though and you now have the freedom to do what you want, when you want. Here is your chance to be completely selfish so make the most of that! If you're finding the past memories of Christmas painful, do something or go somewhere during the holiday season out of the ordinary to celebrate a new start and create some fresh ones.
And if all that isn't enough, go and buy yourself the most extravagant Christmas present you can afford. Christmas isn't all about superficial gifts but a treat to oneself certainly doesn't hurt if you're lacking in festive cheer!
By Laura Yates, Heartbreak Coach