She's obsessively clean- She hoovers hoovers, cares about coaster usage, ottoman placement and the order of her refrigerator magnets. Worst off all, she makes you eat over the sink because you drop too many crumbies.

Monica Geller

Monica Geller

She loves to entertain- She's always the hostess because everyone knows she makes incredible cookies, lasagne and Thanksgiving dinners (with three kinds of potatoes!).

She's really good at cooking- She can even fashion body parts out of meat if you're circumcised and one day need to pretend you're not.

She is incredibly competitive- She'll throw plates at you if she's losing at Scrabble, pull you up if you use words that aren't even words (transponster?!) and FYI- never take her to a reading group.

She's very organised- She has a label maker and a wrapping paper drawer- this woman knows where everything is at any time- unless it in her messy cupboard that no-one's supposed to know about- not even you.

Her hair gets really frizzy when it's humid outside- She looks like Diana Ross on all of your vacation photos.

She likes to take control- She enjoys fun but only if it's organised fun- 'put the caps back on the markers after you've used them' fun (until you hear them click).

She has your wedding all planned out- You may not have even talked about marriage yet, but she has a book, scenarios and budgets, she's also not opposed to tackling another woman for the perfect wedding dress.

She loves her sibling dearly- But not enough to let them sit on her kitchen furniture naked.

She's dated someone way older than you before- He probably had a moustache and a degree in something eye related. You were always irritated by his ability to tip with nothing but a handshake.


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