It’s not ideal- having a long-distance relationship a few times a month but it’s the reality for some couples. Here are some things to help you through when you live together but your partner is away regularly.

Relationships on Female First

Relationships on Female First

Don’t resent them- They are doing what they have to do to keep a roof over your head. There is no point in being mad at them for having to work away from home because it’s all part and parcel of their job. They will probably feel crap about it too so don’t make it worse for them by piling on your own negativity as well.

Consider what’s it’s like from their point of view- Yes you may be at home alone- but at least you are at home, with everything that’s familiar and normal. The novelty of being in a hotel every night wears thin, so be grateful for home comforts and mindful of their situation.

Stay in touch- Whether they work away one night a week or for the entire five days- stay in touch via texts, regular calls and emails. Let them know you are missing them and that you are excited about their return. There is nothing worse than when you feel like your partner doesn’t even notice you’re gone.  

Turn a negative into a positive- It’s not the end of the world when your significant other works away as it gives you some ‘me time’. Albeit forced ‘me time’ but we all need time alone. Use it wisely to do the stuff you want to do like catch up on a good book, watch your favourite TV shows, do a class, take a walk or have a long bubble bath and read a magazine.

Don’t let it be an excuse to do more work- Just because your lover is away doesn’t mean you have to spend extra time working to make it pass quicker- make sure you spend it doing something you enjoy rather than an excuse to catch up on paperwork and emails.

Avoid doing things you would normally do together- Whatever your thing is as a couple- going to the cinema, frequenting your local, watching a boxset, try not to do it without them. Make sure you wait until they are home so you can share the experience as normal. If you go on and do it without them they might feel like their nose has been pushed out.

Don’t become a pity party- Being home solo is not an excuse to sit and cry and be all 'woe is me'- so spend your time well rather than looking on Facebook at all the couples who are together that night, stop pining for your partner- they will be back soon enough and don’t feel sorry for yourself. It’s a massive waste of your time.  

Learn to enjoy your own company- Learn to be happy on your own. It might feel strange at first but you never know- you might just enjoy it. It’s important that you can cope without your partner- you are still your own person after all.

Spend time with or make contact with others- Catch up with friends and family in person or give them an overdue phone call to get all the latest gossip but only if you REALLY want to- not just to avoid being in an empty house or to pass the time. That’s unfair to them.

Watch what you eat- The temptation is to eat whatever you want whenever you want because you partner isn’t there to share or judge you. If you do this every night they are away- the weight will creep on, so don’t deviate too much from you normal meals when they are away. 

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