Kay asks :

Dear Lucy, 

I really do not know what to do. I'm in a relationship with someone but I feel like I make all the effort and that he doesn't care. I feel like I am not in love with him anymore. 

There are these guys that come into my work and their lovely and I'm sort of falling for one of them. I keep thinking about them instead of my boyfriend. Once I'm in bed I feel like crying because I just do not know what to do. I just want to cry.


Hi Kay,

I just want to cry

I just want to cry

Relationships are judged by what we do more than what we say- the proof is in a person's actions. If he promises something and doesn't deliver on that promise then chances are he doesn't really mean what he says.

If you are going through a rough patch with your partner and other men are kind to you, you will probably feel more drawn to them than your boyfriend. It's possible that this period is making you look elsewhere too.

Have you addressed this issue with your partner before? If you have and there has been no change then the same could happen if you bring it up again. If you fell out of love with him before these men showed up at work then that might tell you that it was over long before you became attracted to someone else.

If you don't feel loved or cared for and are making all the effort then perhaps you need to ask yourself the question- can this imbalance be addressed or will it always be the same? If you think he can change then it may be worth talking to him again, however if it's the latter then you may need to consider moving on.

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