Alice asks :

Hi Lucy,

Can you help me? I'm having some guy trouble. This guy wants to date me but I don't want to date him. I really like him though. I also don't want to let him down. What do I do?

Hi Alice,

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

It may hurt him less to tell him the truth than to go out with him for a while and tell him you don't want to be with him that way. This might give his feelings a chance to become stronger, as yours become weaker.

If you like him and care about him then perhaps it's kinder to let him down now before you get into something you regret just to avoid hurting his feelings.

If you're not into him, he would probably be able to tell anyway.

If what you want is to be friends then you can offer him a friendship- it is up to him if he is willing to have you in his life in this capacity or not at all.

It never feels nice to let someone down in the romantic sense; however it is far less damaging to nip it in the bud than it would be if you were to date when your heart isn't in it.


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