Jim-Bob asks :

Hi Lucy, 

I need some advice because I'm ginger and I don't know what to do. I want people to like my hair naturally because I don't want to dye my hair or anything. I need help from always being called ginger and laughed at. It shouldn't matter the colour of my hair. I feel really strongly about this and I need some advice please help me.

 

Hi Jim-Bob,

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

You are absolutely right- your hair colour should not matter at all. Only 1-2% of people around the world have red hair which makes you distinctive and perhaps different from other people in your circle. People are afraid of different, so them laughing at you and calling you names says more about them than it does you. It really says that they can't handle someone being different to them- it makes them feel uncomfortable. You are not and should not feel responsible for how someone else reacts to you- that is their choice.

They may think that they are the norm but normal does not exist. What is normal anyway?

Based on these stats alone you should be proud not to look like everyone else and embrace your uniqueness. The fact that you don't want to dye your hair is a sign that you are not giving into the pressure, but it sounds like you want these comments to stop.

The best thing you can do is stay true to yourself- they will get bored and the attention on you will eventually fade if you don't rise to their taunts.

If they call you 'ginger'- just agree with them- you have ginger hair- they are stating a fact- how very observant of them! If you take it as an observation rather than an insult, there is nothing to be taken to heart.

By laughing at you, all they are doing is shifting their and everyone else's focus onto you rather than themselves. It's a basic defence mechanism, create a diversion about someone else and no one will ridicule or analyse them.

It sounds like they are masking their own insecurities by laughing at you, which sooner or later people will recognise and learn to ignore.

For every person that might mock you- there is another person who is envious of your colouring. Look at how many people dye their hair your colour.

Stay true to who you are and if they can't handle it- that's their problem not yours.


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