Deanna asks :
Hi Lucy,
How can I balance work, university, family and a relationship? I study full time at university while working weekends at a petrol station. My boyfriend works full time all week and the only time we get to see each other is when we go out late at night.
I find that I'm getting really tired with the late nights and having to be up early for work and I'm struggling to complete my university work. Me and my Mom are also missing each other as I'm always out of the house and we never spend time together anymore. How do I balance everything in my life without burning myself out?
Hi Deanna,
Agony Aunts on Female First
It does sound like you have a lot on your plate right now.
If you and your partner both work during the week, then perhaps you have your evenings free after work- why not start them a little earlier? Or make them shorter and have an early night?
Maybe you could schedule a few date nights a week but also allow some time to yourself as well to prevent this feeling if imminent burnout?
Could you pull back your hours at work? Perhaps you could ask your manager to reduce your contract or drop down a shift?
It sounds like your life needs a bit of forethought right now. If you want to make time for your mum, then you may need to schedule this in advance. Or could you call her between meeting up so you miss each other less? If your schedule is more spontaneous than hers then maybe you need to dedicate a time every week to give her a ring?
It might help to start the week by planning out when you need to study, when you will be at work and then plan in time with your boyfriend, time with your mum and time for you. It can feel overwhelming when you are trying to do so much at once, however if you can map it out- then you know you are covering all your bases while still giving yourself some time to prevent burnout.
Other things you could do are to start the day out with something relaxing. Only 15 minutes or so- by reading a bit of a book, drawing or writing things down to get some mental clarity. If you are a creative person- use this time to dedicate to something that is totally unrelated to study or the people around you.
Try to eat well- only buy healthy food at the store and exercise. If you don't have time for the gym, then walk to your lessons, take the stairs or a short walk to clear your head.
Learn how to say 'no'. Although it can be disappointing not to see your family or your partner- if you feel that you are too exhausted- look after yourself first. If you don't- then you won't be your best for those around you.
Take regular breaks- get up and get a glass of water between study; walk around, tidy your space- anything that gives you a break from screen time- like your phone and your laptop. The mind needs a rest from technology every day so take 15 minutes time out to mentally unplug.
tagged in Family University Relationship
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