Joanne asks:

Hi Lucy, 

Am I wrong to go away at Christmas? My daughters are 23 and 20 youngest lives with me. My parents come to mine every Xmas and I am fed up with same old stuff.

 

Hi Joanne,

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

It can be difficult to break a habit with people when you have done the same thing for so long at Christmastime.

The most important thing to remember is that Christmas is also about having a rest and some 'you time'- it is a holiday after all. If you feel resentful of the expectation that you will host at Christmas, then you might not be at your best on the day, which could spoil it for you and your guests.

If you believe you need alone time then it might be a good opportunity for you to break the mould and do something for yourself for a change. If you sample both types of Christmas, you can then decide if you want to alternate or stick with one in the years following this one.

It sounds like there might be opportunities to spend time with family before you leave or when you come back so you don't necessarily have to miss out on family time.

Your children are old enough to be left on their own or go and have Christmas with someone else too.

Have you talked to your family about your alternative plans? It might be worth telling them as early as possible to give them the most amount of time to get used to the idea and also make other arrangements.

If they are against the idea then perhaps explain to them your reasons why and chances are, eventually they will see it from your point of view and wish you well.


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