Dean asks :

Hello My problem is as follows: I met a girl at the xmas do,which resulted in us going for a drink with a few weeks ago but never mentioned i was seeing someone already. Anyway the date went really well, we organised to go out the following week, ie last wednesday but she cancelled so re arranged to go out fri and then she cancelled again saying she was ill so i thought she was messing me around, i got cheesed off and thought she maybe playing games so i thought id play hard to get so i told her i had a girl friend but it backfired! She wasnt best pleased said shed thought she had met a really nice bloke which i am! and said that she liked me and that she really was not well, but isnt looking for anyting serious, ideal i thought! but then said not to contact her until i was single, she didnt want her head messing up. Anyway things were rough with my ex so i finished it Friday night, and left it the weekend to contact Jenni, I tried calling her monday evenging once at 6, 8 then 11 at night but it kept ringing then got her answerphone, so sent 2 texts one saying: Hi hope you had a good weekend, i used it to sort my head out n go out with my mates, it would be good to talk, text me when your free the night went on, still heard nothing and i got a little impaitent lol! so i sent one last msg: Ive finished with my ex but it was meeting you that prompted me, It would be nice to see you, are you free wednesday night, if so would you like to go for a drink. I have not yet had a reply, i know she is working extremly long hours at the moment juggling 2 or 3 jobs, Im not sure if shes just busy or playing hard to get or not interested, should i wait and see if she replys? OR call her Fri hopefully for a chat n see if she wants to do something or just forget about her and move on? I really do like her, tried not to fall for her but i have done and if im honest i would like to see what happens. Sorry for taking so long, this is my first time using one of these sites but a females perspective would be great. Many Thanks

Yin replies

Well .. I'm glad that you realised your mistakes with having a girlfriend. It is not the best way to start a relationship with someone, telling them your in one with someone else, because now she will probably be wondering whether or not you can be trusted. It was also very presumtious of you to assume that she was playing hard to get when she cancelled your dates! All these little things are what women will think so to get back into her good books you will have to do something pretty special. Don't harrass her though, because she may find you too clingy. Remember you have only been out once, and she won't want to feel suffocated before she properly knows you! Good luck

Yang replies

I would advise you to leave it for a couple of weeks, and then text her again saying that you are sorry for leading her on that you were single and explain your situation. Briefly though..she doesn't want an essay! Just say that you're sorry and now that you are single you would love to start again and meet up for a drink if she wants to. If there is still no reply then I would take the hint and move on. Give her some time to think though, and don't get ahead of your self.

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