As we celebrate National Make a Difference Day- we take a look at ten small steps that will make a difference in your relationship.

Be honest with what you want

Be honest with what you want

Try to understand your partner's point of view- You may be able to manage a situation your partner is going through more easily than they can. The important thing is to see it from their perspective. They may not be able to cope with stress as well as you or lack the confidence to deal with a personal or professional crisis with the same assertiveness. If you can grasp the gravity of what it means to them, they will feel like they are not walking through it alone.

Deal with things as they happen- Conversations when you are not on the same page are always hard but better to tackle your problems now than let the resentment build. If you have an issue- talk about it and negotiate your way through. The longer it's left, the greater the likelihood of an argument because feelings have had time to gain momentum.

Think before you speak- A lot of the time, things that are said in haste are regretted. Although you should keep on top of your disagreements, give your reactions a few moments of reflection first. If you are angry- explore the reasons why. Is it them or is it you? Sometimes we are quick to blame our partners for things that we dislike in ourselves so where does the problem really lie?

Talk to one another- Make time each night to turn off your devices and talk. It can be about work, family, friends or you relationship- anything to get the exchange happening. If this is when you get in from work or while lying in bed before you go to sleep- it doesn't matter, just make sure your head is up and you are facing one another.

Create space- If this is to do something in different rooms of the house or leave your home to meet friends or pursue a hobby- ensure you both have passions outside of your relationship. You can't tick ALL the boxes for each other so don't even try.

Trust- Other people will find your partner attractive- people of the opposite sex will engage/work/socialise with them and they will be put in situations where there is temptation. Trust that they will make the right decision or your faith in them will be compromised when obsessing over the 'what ifs'.

Be consistent- Tell them you love them often, wish them a good day and kiss them hello and goodbye as you come and go. It's easy to fall out of these patterns, but they make a huge difference if you can spare just a few seconds each day to do/say them.

Have unconditional faith in them- Encourage them when they start something new, whether it's professional or personal and help boost their faith in their own ability by telling them how much you believe in them. Often this is half the battle when completing something. If their confidence is dwindling- be there to lift it back up.

Be honest- If they have upset you- tell them. If they want a second opinion talk it out and discuss all possibilities both good and bad. If they are making a bad decision, tell them why you feel it's not an appropriate choice. Diplomacy is key when the topic of conversation is around appearance however!

Go to the root cause- If you have relationship woes- sort them out at the source. No amount of bad mothing your partner to your parents, friends or family is going to change anything. Keep your relationship issues between you and your partner and talk them up in company- not down. It's no one's business but yours anyway.


by for relationships.femalefirst.co.uk
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